are you ever going to stop this shit?
youre only fueling the fire.
if i didnt like your art so much i'd have stop watching you a while ago.
so someone doesnt like you. oh well. get over it.
it'll only stop when you stop reacting to it.
im sorry if thats a little harsh, especially for someone you havent talked to in close to a year or so. but i am trying to help.

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considering the way we stopped talking, this is pretty uncalled for and i almost thought it was a joke.

"if i didn't like your art so much i'd have stop watching you a while ago."

thanks, bro, that's totally sweet of you to say. i'll try not to take it too personal.

i'm fully aware of how it works. however you should also be aware that someone you were in love with knows just how to push those overly sensitive buttons, especially at times or in places you don't expect.

"so someone doesnt like you. oh well. get over it."

if it were that straightforward don't you think that's what i would have done? it's not "someone doesn't like me," it's a real issue that has caused me more emotional devastation than i'd like to admit.

the man put me in a fucking mental hospital. have you been in one? do you know what kind of experience that is?

why am i justifying myself to you? i don't even know.

you say you're trying to help yet your comment is brash, baseless, insensitive, and full of flat, clichéd assumptions. if you want to help, you can talk to me. ask me legitimate questions.

but seriously, if you don't know the person, the situation, and what i'm feeling--aside from my metaphorical heart vomit in a journal that doesn't explain anything to anyone but myself--perhaps you should re-evaluate your "smack upside the head" attempt at helping, because believe it or not, i'm fully aware of what's going on. moreso than you.

i'm not pissed because it was "harsh," i'm pissed because it was a judgement, an insult, and a condescending attempt at obvious advice under the guise of "i'm trying to help."

i'm not stupid, you should know that by now. try talking to me like i'm not next time, you might get a nicer response.

alright, im sorry, i dont fully understand the situation. if you need someone to talk to about it, i would like to help. really help. i just get sick of people throwing their problems out into the world looking for attention. i understand now that isnt what youre doing, but thats what it seems like from the outside. so like i said, if you would like to talk about it. im here.

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if i was throwing it out to the world for attention, i would have made the issue a lot more clear. i'm throwing up emotions, the same as i do with my art, only in words. that's all it is or ever was. in fact more often than not i wished there was a disable comments option on my journals. the only reason i published the 2% of things i've written of that nature was because i felt they had enough artistic merit to be viewed as they were.

i have pages and pages of things written on paper, in notes on the computer, saved as text in my phone. they are not cries for help or attention but smears of blood i have wiped from my still-bleeding heart. some look more like paintings than others, and so i publish them to be read.

thank you for your offer. so far i have been coping well enough alone, for the first time in a month. but if i do need someone to confide in, i know you have held out your hand.

alright. i understand constantly writing down thoughts, questions, just trying to sort things out on paper so you can try to make sense of it later. ive done quite a bit of it.
again, im sorry. and yes, im here if you need me.

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